Feminism: a simple perspective

Feminism. Like it or not, the movement has caught attention from many, males and females. In an engaging conversation with a friend, in a short period of time though, he mentioned the impactful word. Perhaps I shall speak out my opinion about the topic that has been debated since the movement started in the nineteenth century. I will not discuss feminism in the political field as personally I agree with the feminists that women should be given equal rights as men are in this field. Women should be given the rights to vote, to represent the people in the parliament and to fill in the positions in the political area to the extent that they are able to manage.

What I would like to share my opinion about is that feminism that simply defines men and women are equal in all aspects. First question to ask is: are they really equal? If so, is being a woman then a misfortune? I believe that men and women have their own roles in the society and the ideal world that these so-called feminists desire may not be an ideal one should it be realised.

If those feminists demand total equality for both genders, would they be able to fulfill their most basic needs, say housing? Physically men and women are indeed different. Why do men have strong-built bodies and are more muscular than women? To protect women, of course! And not to abuse them. Yet some so-called feminist proclaim that the world will be much better with fewer men. Women, being more gentle, are thus more suitable to be entitled for more delicate tasks. Again, what is wrong with doing such housework (cleaning, washing, caring for children etc) that makes some women feel downgraded is really a question whose answer I am really curious about. I know of so many full-time housewives and my mother is one of them. I reckon these women are fantastic as their jobs, though undervalued by modern societies, may not be that easy.

Emotionally, men and women are not the same either. At certain situations, women tend to response with their feelings whilst men are more logical in their actions. Note that this statement is understood by many and hey, you (men and women) cannot get away with your innate characteristics! The fact that women use their feelings more than they do logic is very useful in one of their "prescribed" jobs: caring for children. That is why under most countries' laws, children below a certain age are left to the care of their mothers upon the divorce of their parents, unless special circumstances occur.

The trend in modern societies is that these feminism-inspired women think that their life is all about success, careers and achievements. Those who are single choose not to marry or even start relationships with men thinking that they could live without them. Those who are married sometimes choose their careers rather than their families. What about this scenario: A married couple, both working full time, leaves their 3-year old son to the care of a maid. For me, this is ridiculous. This, as I have observed since I came to Singapore, is the trend in an average middle-class family. How can a maid replace the role of a mother? A maid might let her employee's children do as they wish because they are her employee's children. No wonder that some time ago I read an article in the newspaper about how dependant children are now - they even get their maid to flush the toilet!

What do you think? Share your opinions about feminism in the comment section. I want to hear from you. Do you think men and women should be equated in all aspects? I certainly think not.

Socialization - a summary

In the article "Socialization", the author, O'Neil discusses how children are socialized by their environment in a process called enculturation. As a child is born with barely any culture at all, his/her parents play an important role in shaping his/her behavior, attitudes and values - "personality", as defined by the author - towards certain matters. Subsequently, after a child has grown up and become a parent, he/she will socialize his/her children the same way he/she was socialized. The inheritance of a particular socializing method is observable in the form of a similar pattern within a group in the society.

As members of a particular group are agreeable with the views and norms they share, one who does not conform to these is seen as rebellious or even "mentally ill" (O'Neil, 2006, para 3). In a big-scale society, where different groups exist, O'Neil also points out that members of the existing groups are more tolerant among each other as they have been socialized in, what I would like to call it, a "multi- environment", be it multicultural, multireligious, multiracial and so on.

O'Neil goes further in analyzing the standardization of childhood socialization. This process is usually called education and can be done both formally and informally. In formal education, the government of a nation plays a critical role in standardizing the education system in order to prepare today's generation to face the challenge that may be faced in the future. For instance, the government may want to train as many human resources to prepare highly-qualified labors which can foster the country's economic development. Informal education, on the other hand, is not acquired at a formal institution, rather it can actually be anything outside the school, such as how a mother tells her daughter to behave in a ladylike manner whereas a son may be asked to do otherwise.

Also, a particular culture may view the traditions, attitudes and values of other cultures as inappropriate or even strange. Thus, there is no right or wrong in the process of a childhood socialization. My opinion about this is that we should be open to the diversity of cultures to minimize cultural shocks we may encounter at some point in time of our life, as an old Indonesian saying says, "Di mana bumi dipijak, di situ langit dijunjung" (literally means wherever the earth is stepped on, there the sky is burdened; idiomatically means we should be able to adapt to the customs and traditions of the place we live in).

Reference:
O’Neil, D. (2006). Socialization. Retrieved October 10, 2006, from http://anthro.palomar.edu/social/soc_1.htm

Life is Beautiful (indeed).

Life is Beautiful (Italian: La vita è bella) is an Italian language film which tells the story of a Jewish Italian, Guido Orefice (played by Roberto Benigni, who also directed and co-wrote the film) who tries to help his son, Joshua, survive in the Nazi concentration camp by using his rich imagination. This film has been dubbed to Italian-accented English, perhaps due to its popularity. It also won the Academy Award for the Best Actor, Best Music, Best Original Dramatic Score and Best Foreign Language Film in 1998.

The first half of the film basically introduces the main characters of the story. It is set in the World War II period when Nazi's spirit was overwhelming all over Europe. Young charismatic Guido comes from his hometown to Rome to earn a better living. There he works as a waiter in his uncle's restaurant. In the same restaurant, he steals Dora, who later becomes his wife, from his fiance at their engagement party. The couple finally gets married and lives peacefully with their son Joshua. The plot starts to get tense as Guido, Joshua and Guido's uncle are ordered to join the Jewish concentration camp. Being non-Jewish, Dora is not sent to the concentration camp but she insists on joining her family. She is then allowed, but has to be separated from the rest because males and females go to different camps.

The second half of the film, and also the most touching part, tells the story of Guido and Joshua surviving the concentration camp. Not wanting to let his son down, Guido creates an imaginative story whereby all people in the concentration camp are in a big game to collect a thousand points to win a tank. The points get reduced from one’s point bank if he/she complains for hunger and points are earned if he/she stays quiet and hides from the guard. He convinces Joshua that the guards are so mean that they want to keep the big prize for themselves. Guido also persuades his son to not withdraw from the game by telling him that other children are close to getting a thousand points and he will regret not competing for the tank. The fact that Guido is so convincing, together with Joshua’s innocence, makes the latter questions no more about the suffering of people in the concentration camp.

In the chaos caused by the American advance drawing near, Guido asks his son to stay still in a sweatbox – one final challenge before the tank becomes his. Meanwhile, Guido is trying to rescue Dora. He is caught by the Nazi guards and shot dead. Joshua manages to survive and thinks that he wins the tank. He is also reunited with his mother when the concentration camps are liberated by the American soldiers.

Life is Beautiful is full of funny moments, thanks to the excellent acting of Roberto Benigni. The second half of the film is surprisingly both touching and funny. For big fans of classical music, this film is definitely a must-see. The main music played throughout the film is Belle Nuit by Offenbach. I have watched this film three times, and am never bored watching it and will watch it again if I have time. I strongly recommend the film and two thumbs up for this film!

Problem-Solution

Conflicts are often unavoidable within an organization. In a family, a simple form of an organization, conflicts may arise between family members. The cause to this is likely to be the uncontrollable ego of one individual or a group whose members share a common perspective. Individual family members may assert different needs which may not be compatible with the needs of the family as a whole. One example is the desires of emotionally-immature teenage children that may disrupt the family’s orderliness, such as the desire to own the latest gadgets. The funds, on the other hands, could be used for fulfilling more crucial family needs. The children thus feel their needs are abandoned. Such a clash can be resolved by parents – the supposedly more emotionally intelligent – giving advices to develop the children’s emotional intelligence. Competition amongst family members in extended families is another frequently-occurring case. This usually happens after a most-respected family member departs. The problem can be solved by understanding what one’s own rights and obligations are, as well as others’. To sum up, conflicts in an organization can be solved by cultivating emotional intelligence.

Cause Effect

Lack of emotional intelligence might bring subsequent effects within a community. The very first symptom of this phenomenon is the widely-spread prejudice between groups of different races, ideologies and beliefs. Consequently, intolerance is slowly built up within the community. The last stage of the chain reaction is embodied in a visible action: the act of discrimination, which in extreme cases can take many forms, such as sweeping, terrorism, genocide and civil war. For example, after the 9/11 attack, people throughout the world, including Australia, have become highly prejudiced towards the Muslims. Starting with undesirable gestures, such as exchanging glares between the Westerners and the Middle-Eastern-look, the clash peaked in the racist riot in Sydney in 2005 which was as well triggered by media provocation. With this example, it may be possible to draw a conclusion that vulnerability to external provocation, a form of lack of emotional intelligence, may cause harmony disruption in the community.

Comparison & Contrast

Emotional intelligence plays an important role in different professions to different extent. An engineer and a kindergarten teacher, for example, both need distinct levels of emotional intelligence when dealing with their respective job scopes. As commonly required by other professions, a successful engineer and kindergarten teacher must be creative, well-organized and socially savvy in order to interact with their colleagues. A kindergarten teacher, however, is expected to be more emotionally intelligent than an engineer due to his/her constant interaction with children of a fairly young age. A good kindergarten teacher must understand well the psychology of children of different characters. Mood management, one aspect of emotional intelligence according to Daniel Goleman, is of great importance when encountering with distracted or misbehaving children. Showing inappropriate actions to express emotions to his/her students may bring negative effects to them as children learn a lot from their role models. Despite having to possess high self-motivation, another aspect of emotional intelligence, in order to complete tasks on time, an engineer, on the other hand, deals with physical devices , most of the time; thus making the job require less control of emotions. To sum all up, emotional intelligence is required in both professions although it is used more in one profession – kindergarten teacher – than it is in the other – engineer – due to the intense interaction with children.

Life of Discoveries and Discoveries of Life

Discoveries – major, minor and those in between – have given my life a true meaning. The major discovery in my life so far has been the belief that I embraced a few months ago, Islam. One discovery after another, I was convinced that Islam was the answer to the questions that had remained unanswered for some time – whether God existed, whether life just stopped after death, why there were so many different religions and other rather-skeptical questions about life. To share a bit of my experience, one of the interesting things I discovered about Islam is that the Quran, the Islamic scripture, contains a number of scientific facts which have been confirmed by modern science hundred of years after it was first revealed. Read more at www.quranmiracles.com should you be interested.

Other than that, I guess each day of my life so far has been full of discoveries. These years of my life is all about learning, that is, discovering often-unimaginable things: the huge energy generated by the nuclear fusion actually traces down to the study of the smallest division of matter, atomic physics; and the beauty of numbers in that they can be complex too! As inseparable part of growing up, I have been discovering that my life is also about discovering certain attitudes and characteristics of people which I might not have noticed when I was a little kid. Having been away from my parents for quite some time, I realize that they do care about me a lot – that’s another thing that makes my life meaningful!